Yes, they lived in the projects

Now, that I talked about what I learned in a wealthy place, I want to address what I learned from two women who lived in the projects.  One woman was my great aunt and the other was her neighbor.  The lived in row houses in Chicago.  They were in the hood, but not of the hood.  They kept flowers growing in their front yard.  You could eat off the floor.  My aunt mopped everyday and kept Kool-Aid in the refrigerator.  She often had treats that I thought was interesting.  She would treat herself to a bowl of oyster soup.  The neighbor rose so early, you could smell the bacon in your dreams.  You can set your calendar by the times that she did her laundry and both women watched their language.  I so enjoyed my summers and evenings with my cousins who lived there.  My uncle could fix anything that was broken and he was a good uncle.  There never was any funny stuff with him.  They ate at the table like normal people and their apartment glowed at night with warmth and good feelings.  They were refined people in an unrefined place, yet that did not change them.  There were many a person who told their children not to take rides or candy from drug dealers even though they were the kings of the block.  You would get beat until you saw the light for just even talking to the neighborhood hoodlums.  My older cousin went to church faithfully every Sunday and to this day, he is a gentle giant.  My cousins are highly successful from that place called the projects and that is because they had to live by different rules.  Yes, even I learned what I could do with my life, from the projects.

Single and Saving money

Many people think that you have to spend a lot of money for good quality clothing, makeup and shoes.  I contend that you don't need to spend a lot to get a lot.  Here are some tips for singles who need to look good and save money too.

1.  Find what you look good in and spend money on what you look good in.  You have tried the trends and they did not work for you.  Now, go for the cut or fabric that makes you look like a knockout.

2.  Look for famous brands in places that you don't expect them.  High end consignment can offer designer looks without the price.

3.  Shop off season, enough said.

4.  Accessorize your outfits.  A scarf and a pair of earrings goes a long way.

5.  Learn to cook.  The money you save can go to spice up that wardrobe.

6.  If you buy makeup, wear the makeup.  It does have an expiration date, use it or loose it.

7.  Travel.  It gives you an opportunity to find interesting pieces that will define your look.

8.  Remember that elegance is not how much you have on, but how well you wear what you have on.

9.  Anything that is too tight looks cheap no matter what you paid for it.

10.  A loud and tacky attitude can destroy the most exquisite of evening gowns.

Learning to Live

I grew up strict pentecostal.  I did not wear pants until I was about twenty two.  I did not wear makeup until I was eighteen.  I listened to only Christian music and most days, I went to church.  I became a member of a subset of Christianity that was a secluded group all of it's own.  We perceived ourselves to be the only church that one can go to and we did not fellowship outside of our churches.  I lost relevance with my peers and gave this church everything.  In my twenties, I broke away from this church and found that life was so much bigger than that.  I became more sophisticated.  I learned that secular music was not all bad and christian music was not all good.  I learned how to go to the movies.  I learned how to dance and I wore lipstick.  It was not until I was able to see that I am not all spirit, but that I am body, soul and spirit, that I began to grow as a person.  It was not until I broke from the traditional path, that I understood a basic balance issue.  God only required of Israel, ten percent of their income.  For the Levites, who served all day long, they were relieved from the menial task of working because they lived from the tithe.  Levites were chosen to give all of their lives, the others came in and out of worship and gave only a tithe.  The rest of their lives, they married, they gave in marriage, the planted gardens and they ate from them.  They drank wine at weddings and they mourned at the passing of loved ones.  They lived their lives.  When I emerged from such a restricted place, I did not know how to live.  Thank God I have a better balance now, then I did then.  Being in a place where no one else is right but you, you have set rules to follow and it excludes those who don't follow the rules is the basic setup of a cult.  A place where everything you do is related to them.  Thank God for balance.
     Going forward, this life I used to live, made me uncomfortable as a human being.  I was told that God would send you a husband and never learned the art of dating.  I was discouraged from dating to simply sit and wait on God.  Well, I sat and I waited.  I am now passing a milestone in age and I am still waiting.  The religion made me uncomfortable with being a woman and expressing my femininity.  I suppressed the sensual part of me that longed to run barefoot through the tulips and then perhaps maybe, I would fall in love.  Falling in love is now impossible for me without help from on high.  I had to learn to become comfortable with my own sensuality that was forbidden to ooze out in a song, or even a dance.  I became hard and unmoving, unyielding and rigid.  I was for sure God had more in store for me than this.
     My salvation came at a time when the pastor did not know my name, most of the church did not know my name and somehow that worked.  The freedom to have a cocktail at a wedding and to dance all night long was finally available to me.   I could explore different ways to display what was suppressed.  I could take a long walk in a short dress and a flower in my hair.  I could listen to Barbara Streisand all day long and I could talk on the phone with a man and just have a great conversation.  The balance of being able to figure life out on my own just like the rest of my peers.  No not me, I kept myself for marriage only for the guys in the church to marry women with two and three kids.  Now, nothing and no one will keep me from living the life I want to live.  I am so glad that I found it worth the living.

Things I learned from a place of wealth

Any person who desires to have money needs to get some things figured out first.  At one point in my life, God dropped me off in a wealthy place.  For the first time in a long time, I was around people that did not have to struggle for money.  It was one of the greatest lessons learned.  One of my teachers was a man with a family that simply loved me.  I spent many a Sunday dinner at his house.  He told me of a time when he attempted to go to a impoverished church where he and his wife clearly made more money than most of the members.  He said that the situation was so dire, he ended up leaving for a church where they could be more comfortable.  Here is what I learned.
1.  Disparity in income can cause rudeness.
2.  When people know you have money, you will constantly be asked for it.  Learn to say no without qualifying it.
3.  Your finances are private even if it is publicly known what you do for a living and that living pays well.
4.  Question motives.  Some people follow money and that may mean that they will follow you.
5.  Make your inner circle consist of people who are like you.
6.  Avoid public giving, make your financial contributions in private.  For this cause I stopped giving money in offering baskets and prefer to send it online in the form of a check. 
7.  Put your money in property.  Don't remain a renter, buy your home.
8.  Cars depreciate the minute you drive it off the lot.  Don't put all your money into a car.
9.  Save something
10.  The most expensive item you own should not be your coat.  Looking good is relative.
11.  Stop outpatient care.  When your money is going to every one's problems but yours, something is wrong.
12.  Put your family in check, they are the first leeches to come.
13.  Don't fool with anyone who won't work.
14.  Lay away for retirement.
15.  Look for ways to show charity that avoid giving directly to people.  I personally give my charity to churches and child welfare agencies.  If you ask me directly, I will say no.

I am not rich, but I am certainly on my way.  I have always known that wealth was in my future so I make sure I talk to people who can tell you a thing or two about money. 

He hated the woman I became

I can remember when I was nineteen.  I went to see my father who had not seen me for over fifteen years.  It was bittersweet.  When I went to see him, I was in my sophomore year of college.  I had a lot to say and he cried over it.  He hated the woman that I became.  I was independent.  I refused to depend on him for anything.  I had learned through the years that he was not dependable.  Sometimes, he sent something for Christmas and sometimes he did not.  Sometimes, I knew where he lived and sometimes I did not.  Therefore, I learned to be independent.  I learned to speak up for myself.  My father was silent on every major issue that I had faced until that point, choosing to only become vocal when there was no chance that he would have to pay child support.  I learned to be vocal.  I learned to be fatherless.  I covered myself.  I protected myself and I paid for college all by myself.  I made mistakes and I paid for them.  I learned to be fatherless.  When he saw the woman I became without him, he did not like me anymore.

My Southern Ladies Training

I did not grow up in the south.  I grew up in a place where most of the people there were born in the south.  That being said, most of the people had very southern ways.  I spent my formative years there and I still can remember it.  For starters, the women who made me let it be known that you should not go out the house looking like your not ready to meet the world.  They got dressed in the morning for the day like they got dressed for work or church.  Even if they were going to the post office, they looked presentable.  In a way, they developed a signature.  I can recall the different products that represented people.  Pastor Parker would don a turbine when her hair was not done.  Aunt Brunette wore her signature Chocolate Raspberry lipstick.  Laura Cheatham could be seen in the evenings and mornings walking her dog named Brown Sugar.  Carolyn Black has worn her hair in a bun since I can remember.  I can tell you who is coming down the street even from the back.  For the men, the defined themselves by where they worked.  Brother Bolling worked at Wendy's.  Brother Morgan worked at Illinois Power.  Rev. Downey worked for the city.  Now that I think of it, every Rev. looked like one wherever they went.  Sunday was the greatest day of the week.  Some of the southern women cooked two meat or entrees on Sunday.  Dinner was always early and it followed church service.  Most of the town went to church somewhere.  Whether it was Greater Faith Tabernacle, Shiloh Baptist, Pavey Chapel or Lively Stone, we went to church.  On Sunday you could not turn on the television and we went to church all day long.  Other days of the week paled when it came to Sunday.  On Sunday, we wore our best clothing.  There was no such thing as casual and you said greetings to everyone.  It was a genteel society, but I loved it.  The rhythms and the waves helped you time life and gave it meaning.  When I look back at my life and how I lived it, I owe most of who I am today to those women and men.  They seemed to put a little elegance in everything they did.  They ate on table cloths and wore spring coats.  They stopped to say hello and acknowledged my very existence.  For that I am grateful.  That town has changed, but it is still very southern.  The "all you can eat" buffet has the best mashed potatoes I have ever eaten.  Most folks still stop and speak and you can find someone in dress and heels in the grocery store.  I was healed by this place.  Now that I live in a town where sleeping and waking are not always in rhythm and Veteran's Parkway has three lanes of traffic, I thank God for my Southern ladies training.  They taught me to be human in a very cold and cruel world.

Get up and Go

New doors are opening for me right before my eyes.  Opportunities that I did not see are visualizing on my horizon.  A bright future is in store for me, but there is one thing I must conquer.  When God opens a door for you that is not going to open for those around you, you can become conflicted.  The folks around you aren't going to agree with you going through the door because, they want you with them.  Your "haters" don't want you to go through the door because they hate you.  You can stand in the doorway debating what life would be and is going to be just because you took advantage of an open door.  Sooner or later, you find that you wait so long in confusion, that the door shuts for you too.  Now, your system will come and rebuke you for not going through that door.  You will rebuke you for not going through that door.  You have to prepare for opportunity to come.  Put words in your mouth that let folks know you aren't scared of leaving them.  You don't mind taking a different path and you don't care how much they pray you stay.  You have to be like the wise man who came and told his servants that he was taking a long journey.  Prepare the way.  Even Jesus had his birth announced by angels and his life proclaimed by John the Baptist.  He waited until his day came and then Jesus entered this earth in flesh form.  Going through a door will change you and your systems, but don't just stand there wondering.  Go through the door.

Mary, Mary Quite Contrary

I think a lot about gardens.  I don't have the space for one in my complex, so I take a short ride to Forrest Park and enjoy the garden space.  In the summer, I go to the zoo and picnic in the gardens.  It is absolutely freeing.  St. Louis is one of the most fantastic spots for flower searching when the season is warm.  Every now and then, I see a city worker making sure the grounds stay gorgeous.  As a matter of fact, they work really hard mowing and pruning and picking up the trash.  I wondered if they ever brown bagged a lunch and sat down by the botanical gardens to simply enjoy the beauty.  I realized that you can work all day to keep it beautiful, but then not enjoy it.  That is what I think of when I think of a family.  Family is notorious for becoming the undoing of the very network they want to build.  I believe it is because they focus on the weeds so much, they can't see the beauty in what is happening that is good.  I get on the phone with my cousins and all I hear is how they have ill treated each other.  I, on the other hand, only want to remember the good old days.  We don't have to rehearse where the thorns were, or that the cherry tree died.  Bad things will define themselves, we don't need to help it.  Dry patches will never heal if we keep picking at it and some parts of the garden simply need another season.  It will just take time.  Now, next time you go to the family reunion, remember to enjoy your family and not just rehearse and nurse old wounds.

I am not a prophet nor a prophet's son.

There is a special place in my heart for the prophet Amos.  He is one that I can relate to.  I grew up in a religious set that had it's own aristocracy.  Pastors and their children were like Kings and Princes.  Then there was the rest of us.  I did not fit there.  If there were nobleman that meant your mother was an evangelist and your father a minster or elder.  My mother was a Sunday school teacher ransomed by grace and my father did not believe in God until after I was good and grown.  You can say that he was an atheist.  My grandmother was before her time and discounted because she was a woman.  I was rejected.  At least I could count on my looks, but I was overweight so that left me out.  Among church boys, they looked for sexually active church girls and I wasn't giving up nothing.  They rejected me.  Church women told me that having sex outside of marriage did not mean a thing.  They told me I could jump up and marry elders, like they did.  When I decided to remain celibate until marriage, they rejected me.  After realizing that church was not where I fit in, I went to academia where I excelled.  I loved to learn about things and I did well there until college.  In college, I found that it was not grades that made the person, but money.  If you don't have money, it does not matter about the grades.  I was dirt poor, so many people shunned me.  Can you imagine how surprised I was to receive a calling into the ministry.  I had no money.  I had no pedigree.  I was the wrong gender and in some places, the wrong color.  Amos says that he was not a prophet nor a prophet's son.  He said that he was a gatherer of the sycamore fruit.  He was a common "Joe Schmo" who just happened upon a God who uses ordinary people.  All the signs of ministry weren't pointing at me, but God chose me.  I am a testament to the fact that God does not look at what you have, or who your father is, or what title you have, or what seat you sit in, or how much money is in the bank.  He uses and blesses ordinary lives and causes them to be extraordinary.  I think back on those days when people could barely remember my name and I thank God for the knowledge.  I know that the only reason why society recognizes it now is because God has made it an advantage to know me.  God has made my words a value and my presence a blessing.  Most people who have come in contact with me will never forget me.  That is God.  One time in my life, people mispronounced my name, made me feel bad for spending food stamps and talked about my mother while I was sitting at the table trying to eat.  I was fearfully and wonderfully made then, but I was not a value to anyone.  God is amazing.  If he can do it for me, he can do it for you.

Lying and excellence

I grew up a magnificent liar.  Lies were so common that the truth was barely seen.  When I began to be delivered from lying, I found that people liked me better as a liar.  My first encounter with lying was not at home per se, but in church.  I have been a member of at least fourteen different congregations since birth.  I remember them with poignant clarity.  Some were huge cathedrals and some were store fronts.  It was in the combination of these experiences that I learned about lying.  Some of the churches that I attended were nothing more than rooms with a floor.  The seats were damaged and a few had no working toilets.  Some of the kitchens they tried to feed me out of, had visible bugs and was beyond repair.  Service times varied like river water and you were never sure when you would get out.  It seemed like church leaders were indifferent to the people as long as they paid the tithe.  About the age of ten, I was baptized at East Mt. Zion church in Cleveland.  That is when I noticed a difference.  Services were timely and the messages were relevant, but what I enjoyed was the beauty of the sanctuary.  It was one of the prettiest churches that I had seen in my whole life to that point.  From that point on, I refused to say something was excellent when it was not.  I will concede that it is the best you can do, but I will not call it excellent.  I finally gave my life to God at the age of twelve.  The church I attended then was one of the prettiest in town.  The carpet was red and the pews were cushioned.  The windows were stained green and cream and over the pulpit was a hand painted picture of Christ that my pastor painted herself.  She had a modern kitchen but she did not allow selling in the church.  Whatever we served was free.  She was timely and had well prepared lessons.  Every Saturday, was church cleaning day so that Sunday, the basement smelled like Pine Sol.  I will never forget Pastor Mary Lou Parker and her family.  She had a spirit of excellence where nothing less would be applauded.  I can remember Missionary Robbie Cobbs who was elegant in every way.  Whatever she put her hand to do was done well and was excellent.  I won't forget her either.  Now, when I go to churches where excellence is a work in progress, I don't offend.  I bow out politely and get in my car.  I go to a nice restaurant and I sit to eat in excellence.  I will no longer tolerate lying to spare your feelings.  If I can't say anything, I won't say anything.  It keeps your feelings from being hurt and it keeps me from lying.

A lesson in the laws of leaving a legacy.

I have learned, in my life, how to leave something or prepare it for change.  I don't think we know how to prepare for change.  I take this wisdom from the Bible.  There are at least two parables where a master takes a far journey entrusting his servants to be good stewards until he returns.  The master always leaves something to make profitable.  He always tells his servants that he is leaving and he always comes back.  What he does not say is when.  When I think of this, it becomes a pattern for life.  Never leave a place without a proper benediction.  A benediction is a prayer of blessing for those who are departing.  Even in anger, you can find some kind words to say in parting.  I never leave someone without showing them to the door and saying goodbye.  It is important for the next transition of their life.  The next thing is that one should leave something behind.  In the Bible, the master left talents.  You should never leave a place taking all of it's resources with you.  Just like it is wrong to die and leave nothing but unpaid bills, it is wrong to leave a place with others cleaning up your mess.  It sets a precedent when a leader leaves the incoming leader with a mess it will take the whole administration to fix.  Lastly, come back.  It is always good to visit places where you have left seed to see how it has grown.  I consider it rude to leave a place and then respond with indifference to events that place you in that same circle of people.  You should now be able to see people from a former place at a wedding and the wedding remain a pure moment.  It is important how you arrive at a place and it is important how you leave a place.  Don't leave it in ruins, but leave a legacy.

Vain imaginations and lying vanities.

Today, my mind goes back to the schoolyard playground where my friends and my enemies met after Christmas break.  It was, Oh So, important to wear something, on that day in January, than no one had seen.  We waited through the school day for recess.  It was the most precious of all the minutes of that day.  The person who had the most gifts under the tree normally was the quietest.  That person knew that their gifts would hush the crowd.  The person who just got what their parents could afford was silent too.  It was our version of Don't Ask/Don't Tell.  The loudest cat in the litter box was the person who got absolutely nothing.  They named game systems, bikes, gym shoes, and boom boxes.  They talked about clothes that was stored for a special occasion and presents so expensive, their was no way their momma was going to let them bring it to school.  All the while, when they were talking, we looked at their clothes and their book bag and their shoes.  It told us the real story.  When we got tired, we challenged the poor child.  It was then that he or she thought we were calling him a liar and those were fighting words.  Sometimes, we took up arms and fought.  Other times, someone else began to show what they got for Christmas.  We all just changed the subject.  Now that I am grown, I find the same scenario.  People sit and say what they will do with a million dollars, but can't manage five bucks.  They say what they are going to do to improve their lives and go home back in front of the same television set.  They set lofty goals that sound good, but the year rolls around and they have absolutely nothing to show for it.  Last year, I proclaimed a 100 pound weight drop.  Now that the end of the year is here, I have about thirty off.  I would be sad, but I can say that I have something to back up my words.  I am definitely not the same person I was last year.  I have a scale to say that I attempted my goal even if I did not meet it.  The shame would have been if the year rolled out and I was just as big as I was last year.  We have to learn that our words mean something.  We have to learn to not just let our words become vain imaginations.  They just can't be lying vanities.  What we were doing on the playground years ago was lying.  God help us all.

A deciduous journey

Outside my window, there is a tree.  I first noticed it in the summer when the leaves were lush and abundant.  It seemed to be a happy tree.  What tree would not be happy in the summer?  Pic knickers lunched in it's shade.  Star crossed lovers carved their name in the bark, and someone even hung a swing.  It was easy being green in the summer.  July and August were dreams come true and September was the magnum opus.  Life was not supposed to change for the tree, but it did.  Each morning, there was a visible struggle to remain green.  The sun hid it's rays and the daylight went home early.  The winds blew and it took the strength of ten men to hold the leaves in their place.  Sometime in October, the tree grew tired and relaxed into a beautiful vision of orange and yellow.  He thought that it wasn't as bad as he perceived it to be.  He actually liked the smell of pumpkin soup from the house and the scarecrow placed by the gaslight for decoration.  He liked the children dressed like cowboys and Indians eating taffy apples at the Fall Festival.  He enjoyed the lull of the season and mulled apple cider.  It was all picturesque until the winds picked up and became colder, stronger and frequent.  He tried to grab his leaves and pull them to himself, but when the winds died down, he was bare.  Each day, another part of himself was revealed.  Each day something showed that had once been hidden.  by Thanksgiving, there was nothing left to hide.  How could he live exposed to the elements, alone in the moonlight, abandoned by the sun?  It was all so bleak, but the short days passed quickly and in the night sky, no one discerned his nakedness.  It was quite peaceful.  He slept.  He slept months until he decided to just remain that way.  He could sleep the rest of his life.  In February, he began to feel something working inside him.  It was something dreadfully wonderful.  It made him afraid and it made him alive.  Could it be that he had not been forgotten after all?  The Sun greeted him earlier and earlier and the snow and ice turned to simple rain.  At the end of March, he sneezed and out poured the greenest leaf.  It was greener than when he last saw it and it certainly was prettier than when he last saw it.  Each day, they got greener and more greens begot more greens until he was full again.  In June he waved in the breeze happy and unafraid of autumn and winter.  Spring and summer would come.  It had to come.  God said it had to come, so even if trouble is here for a little while; it can't last always.  If there is an ending, there is a new beginning.  There is always a new beginning.

Bitterness

Everyone in life has something that they can be bitter about.  It is our way of holding someone responsible for where they have left us or what they have done to us.  Bitterness is like killing yourself to hurt someone else.  It is the only thing that you can think to do to make yourself feel better, only "feeling better" never happens.  Life swirls out of control, you hurt people you love, you love people you have hurt, awkward moments become awkward years and before you know it, life is done and what have you done with it.  Today, I sat down with a wise man and we discussed life.  It tries to leave you bitter, but you have to refuse it.  It tries to leave you hurt, but refuse it.  When I was small, my mother and father divorced.  One tried to hurt the other in various ways.  Instead of moving on like they wanted to, they kept picking at a sore and expecting it to heal.  When I became old enough for parents to become friends, I kept them parents.  Other than my seasonal obligations, I kept them on a long handled spoon.  While trying to destroy each other, they destroyed the part of the "other" that lived in me.  My father hated my adherence to religion.  My mother was very religious.  My mother hated my attitude.  I act like my father.  Bitterness did not destroy just them, it destroyed me. 

Hunger comes in many colors

It is true that once one becomes a humanitarian, you lose your sense of loyalty to man's divisions.  You begin to see people as people.  Of late, I have been emerging into something new, different and wonderful.  Something in my life has stretched me far beyond where I ever thought that I would go.  It has caused me to see things so differently.  It has caused me to see things as they are.  Once upon a time, I used to believe in causes that went no further than my own church, my own family or myself.  My world was as small as a fishbowl and hunger only had one color.  As I have been stretched by my place of employment to see disadvantage, hunger, cold, and illiterate in what ever color shows up on your front porch, I have become a humanitarian.  I am not the champion for the black person.  I am the champion for the down trodden and those denied the basics of living.  I challenge you to begin to see beyond yourself and into a bright world that needs another King, another Ghandi, and another Mother Theresa.

Wasting the day

You can pray for something that God has no intention of doing in your life.  Jeremiah 29 speaks to this cause.  Jeremiah says that it will be seventy years before God brings them out of Babylon free.  That was a hint to put your efforts somewhere else.  You aren't coming out until he says you are coming out.  God told them to marry, and give their daughters in marriage.  He told them to pray for Babylon because their peace is now your peace.  Notice, that he did not tell them to pray to be free.  There was an appointed time to be free, there was no need to pray for something God already answered.  To pray anything other than God's will is simply wasting the day.

You and Only You

     One day, I was sitting in a meditative mode and I heard the Lord say, "Some doors open for you and only you".  In the same scenario, I saw a person debating whether they should go through the door because someone they are in relationship with is not going to be able to go with them.  When I worked for a University, I saw so many students torn between embracing college and remaining in a relationship with someone who just was not accepted.  It was not going to work for them.  College was going to split the two.  Some students even left college to go home and attend Jr. college with their peers who weren't college material.  Sometimes, the door swings open and the only way you are going to go through it is alone.  You can't take your family members, you can't take your church, you can't take your friends and you may have to leave your mother and father.  The door was never their destiny and to try to squeeze them in a place that does not fit is wrong.  I have a millionaire in my family.  She has doors opened to her that is not open for the rest of us.  I understand that.  She is not obligated to pay my mortgage or buy me a car simply because she is my rich cousin.  That door has not opened to me yet. It is not wrong that she takes full advantage of where she is in life.  You can get into so much trouble by trying to drag people who aren't prepared for where you are going with you.  When they get there, they are uncomfortable, they are unprepared and they will fail.  You have taken them to a place where they were never meant to be.  Some doors you just have to go through alone.

Done

Today's thought piggy backs off of yesterday's blog.  It references the parable of the talents and the unprofitable servant in Matthew 25.  It came to me how thoughtful the unprofitable servant's response was.  He says," I knew you were a hard man, reaping where you sowed not".  He chose a lot of words to simply say.  I did nothing.  Here is what nothing sounds like
I didn't have time
It slipped my mind
I'll do it tomorrow
It's on the agenda
Don't think I forgot
I really tried to
I ran out of time
It wasn't in the budget
We create so many ways to say, that the job was not done.  I learned this one thing in management.  A job undone is a job undone no matter how you say it.  It pushes me to continue doing a thing until that thing is completely and totally done.  Only then can he say, " Well Done".  He can say well done if the job is done.

Are you an Unprofitable Servant.

Matthew 25:24-25

 ²⁴Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed:
 ²⁵And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, there thou hast that is thine.

I used to feel sorry for the one who had the misfortune of only having one talent.  It is the same sorrow that I felt for people who make minimum wage or people with a lot of debt.  I had a "poor man's " pity.  When I read the parable of the talents I thought God was rather cruel to the one with one talent.  Years later, I went back and took another look at what the unprofitable servant said.  He said, in essence, "Because you were a hard man forcing me to give you something you did not work for, I hid the talent and give you it back."  It was the most ungrateful thing to do.  He decided to do nothing focusing on the owner rather than the seed the owner gave him.  We so often focus on many things except the seed given us.  We become the experts on what the president should do, but not ourselves.  When it comes to us, there are a million and one reasons why we don't profit.  We have expectations of Oprah Winfrey, Bill Cosby and Bill Gates, but we aren't good stewards over what we have.  I remember reading a story about Flip Wilson.  His family members wanted money from him.  He agreed to pay for college educations.  He refused to just give them money because they asked.  He agreed to give them a seed.  It was up to them to make it profitable.

Remember that they are children

1 Corinthians 13:11

When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

     Every year the same controversy pops up in Christendom.  Do I allow my child to participate in Halloween or do I forbid it?  As a child, my mother did not allow me to participate in Halloween.  I understood that being sanctified meant a huge list of do's and don'ts.  Because I was a child, the grand interpretation of the satanic origin of Halloween meant nothing.  I could barely read the words in the Bible let alone interpret them.  My thinking was that of a child.  All the other children seemed to be having so much fun and I was stuck doing nothing.  When I got older, I understood as an adult.  I did not celebrate Halloween, but I did not make my children in my classrooms suffer.  I decided to celebrate Fall Festival.  I made caramel apples, I roasted pumpkin seeds, I made pumpkin pies and I created themes for them to dress in non violent costumes.  One year, It was the wild west and we all were cowboys.  One year it was the 1950's and we all were teenagers.  In time, they will come to know what Halloween is and make the decision for themselves.  One day, they will be adults and they may not ever need Fall Festival again.  As a child, I would have understood a fun alternative.  I could not understand nothing.  Nothing meant that you just did not care.  That is the only conclusion I could come to as a child. 
     We have to remember how adult decisions appear in the eyes of a child.  For those who partake, I ask that you use caution.  For those who abstain, I ask you to provide an alternative.  We must always remember that children don't understand theology.  They truly do think like children.

Great people are not always found in great places.

     One day, I was in church doing my "church" thing.  I had become down because I was trying to move out of my current position to one in a public sector.  It was a pivotal point seeing that after that, a move would not be wise.  Reluctantly, I even considered a job in the corporate world.  I turned to find a man standing in front of me with words he had to give me.  He said," Great people are not always found in great places".  That word hit me like a fast ball.  I always feared that people would not be able to see the real me if I wasn't in a big place.  I thought people would judge me if I did not do something to make my greatness known.  Who wants to be great in the wilderness.  Over the years, I have come to realize that some of the greatest pastors don't pastor mega churches, some of the greatest singers haven't won a Grammy and some of the prettiest people never graced a runway.  They are the everyday greats whose stage was a spotlight in my life.  Their greatest contribution was that they provided me comfort and guidance along the way.  My supervisor at the job I stayed at, told me something that I shall never forget.  She said, "When these children leave us the remember the bright spots.  We are the bright spots."  Now, that is greatness.

For the Sake of Peace

2 Samuel 21

 ¹Then there was a famine in the days of David three years, year after year; and David enquired of the LORD. And the LORD answered, It is for Saul, and for his bloody house, because he slew the Gibeonites.

     There are times, in our lives, when we experience a delayed consequence.  It didn't start with you.  It had nothing to do with you, but your the one that will pay for it.  David had nothing to do with what Saul did with the Gibeonites, but because there was a covenant broken, the issue had to be fixed, someday.  David did what needed to be done for the peace of Israel.  He took seven of the sons of Rizpah and offered them to be killed for the broken covenant.  Rizpah beat away the buzzards and cried.  It was one of the most unfair stories in the Bible, but in the end, God opened up the skies and it rained.
     What has been left in your hands to repair that was not your fault in the first place?  What price are you paying for some distant relatives mistake?  What are you having to do for the sake of peace?  Are you bitter about what it is costing you?
     Some years ago, I was left to raise children that I did not ask for.  I ran up debt that I am still repaying.  I suffered from years of bitterness and brokenness that many got tired of hearing.  It was not their burden.  Both children lived full lives and died in God and my job was done.

     This weekend I visited their graves in my hometown.  The leaves were just turning from the trees and it was a warm southern day.  The sun had come from behind the clouds and I had not a worry to my name.  I peered at the headstone of one, and the memorial of the other and a sense of pure peace filled my heart.  I am finally at rest with the price.  I finally found peace.

Departing is Such Sweet Sorrow

1 Corinthians 7:15
But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such [cases]: but God hath called us to peace.


     The ending of a relationship can be painful.  It can be especially painful when one party is trying to make it work and someone just wants to walk away.  It's not just man/woman relationships that end this way.  It could be siblings, parents, coworkers or friends.  It puts you in a quandary when your affections are for the relationship to continue, but the reality is the relationship is going to end.  In the above scripture, there is a believing spouse and an unbelieving spouse.  The scripture says to allow the unbelieving spouse to depart.  That can also be interpreted for any union where two people cannot seem to walk in agreement anymore.  God simply says that he calls us to peace.  You can have more peace by letting something go, than by holding on to it.  You are not in bondage when someone doesn't want you anymore.  You can bring more damage trying to force something that no longer fits. 
     There can be a real sense of wholeness and serenity when the nights get quieter, and your sleep gets sweeter.  You may even find that you can find a place for cordiality when you are not forced to occupy the same space.  There are times in my life when I knew my chapter was coming to an end.  It always worked better when I accepted it and not worked against it.  Not only can life leave you with endings, but it can also leave you glad to see the end coming.

I pray that you remember, God has called you to peace regardless to the price that the peace will cost you.


Walk On By
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PzchQ_ydowk

Whom the Lord Loveth..............

Psalm 51:9-11 

 ⁹Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.
 ¹⁰Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
 ¹¹Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.

Chastening is like a good bath when you are filthy from the world.   No one likes to be told that you stink, your hair is gritty, your toes are jammy and your underwear is cheesy.  It takes a pretty sick mind to enjoy being dirty.  Cleansing makes you feel good and it makes you feel better.  I went through a period in my life where God was doing some chastening.  It wasn't just me, but the system that created me.  It was a long twenty year period and I often blamed God for abandoning me.  When it was over, and it is over, I understood that things just could not go on that way.  God had to do something or the next generation was done and I was that next generation.  God fixed me.

 I pray that as each one goes through a correction that it be just as sweet.  Even his chastening feels good.  I am smiling.

 Fix Me by the Alvin Ailey Dance Company

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4CXk1mQVCgI

Have you considered...............

Job 1:8  Have you considered my servant Job

There seems to be a theological teaching that says God's goodness can be measured by the amount of cars in your driveway, or the amount of people at your church, or the house that you live in.  Popular prosperity teaching denotes that God is only on your side if you have some sort of sign.  Even in churches, laity tramples themselves to hear a message by a popular preacher and then skip their regular service on Sunday morning.  It is such a great deception.  One day, I was walking along a trail and God showed me what was his.  He said that the earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof, but he did not make the road I walked on.  Man made that road.  Man put his system right on top of God's perfect world so that when you travel, you have to use the system to get there.  That is the same way it is with Satan.  He has a way for you to be blessed because he holds the worlds systems.  You can be rich and not even be saved because there is a system in place that allows you to do that.  Success should not be seen by things because the enemy can give you things.  What he cannot do, is bless you outside of the system.  What he gives will not last and there always is a catch.  The same God that diminished Job is the the same God that snatched sudden wealth out of nothing greater than what he had before.  Now, that is God.  You can't predict him, and he follows no set plan.  He can bless in a recession where this world is failing.  He can bless in a time when everyone else is loosing their homes.  God is not limited to the worlds system.  Who wouldn't want to serve a God like that.

Apples and Onions

I talk to single people all the time who name the name of Christ and participate in risky dating practices.  They say they love God, but are found with people who don't love God.  I used to think that it was rebellion, but then I discovered that it was desperation.  When you allow yourself to get too lonely, or too bored, or too hungry, you begin to see things that aren't all that good for you as good.  When a person has not eaten for a while, they get to a state in hunger that foods they would not ordinarily eat become appetizing.  Onions begin to taste like apples.  Once your hunger is fulfilled, they begin to despise the onion because they finally realize that it is an onion.  That is how dating becomes toxic.  If you date someone that you know you aren't going to marry, you end up being more hurt than if you would have left them alone in the first place.  For the most part, it is the unbeliever who is played like a fiddle by a believer, who will satisfy their hunger for love only to pester the poor person into coming to a church they don't like or serving a God they don't understand.  It is the believer who gets the heart entangled and then say to the unbeliever, if you love me then you would get saved.  No one should come to Christ that way.  Christ should not be dangled like a carrot on a stick for you to lure a potential mate.  God did not create anything greater than himself.  Your body should not leave you hurting people like that.  Your longing for companionship should not imprison someone from making an independent decision.  Wisdom says that one day, the person you lured will see you for who you are.  They will understand that Christ was not your total Lord and you will be just as manipulative as unsaved partners are.  Once that happens, then you will be the one chasing the carrot on the stick.  Who wants to live like that.

Matthew 10:38
And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me.

    As you know, my home is filled with crosses.  I have old rugged crosses and crystal crosses.  I wear them around my neck and hang them from my Christmas tree.  They adorn every nook and cranny.  It is a symbol of the soul reason why I am able to live this wonderful life.  I found this song five years ago and it is my favorite song.  I am ever mindful that the essence of my salvation is not things, but a thing, the cross.  We are not even worthy of him, if we deny the taking of a cross.  When I have bad days or difficult days, I remind myself that it is in the list of crosses that I must bear and that Jesus had his too.  A song from my youth says, Must Jesus bear the cross alone and all the world go free. There is a cross for everyone and there is a cross for me.  I hope you like this song,  It always takes me in.

My prayer is ecumenical.  I have a concern that the world is preaching self help, or entitlement or prosperity and the message of the cross is denied.  Life has it's troubles and there are times when you just have to bear it.   All else pales to the cross, Nothing compares to the cross my grossest issue becomes a whisper when I survey........ 
When I survey

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-mKnY2HMXg

Diamonds and Pearls

Diamonds are the precious things that you learned from the life that you lived.  Pearls are the tidbits of wisdom that you would not trade for the world.  This blog is based on Christianity because it is the only religion that ever worked for me.  Over the past year, I developed a way of encouraging myself with the word of God through scripture, songs (Not all Christian), and daily devotions.  I talked to the Lord in the morning and preached to myself at night.  Sometimes, the only person I had to talk to was God.  This blog is about what I have learned from the Lord and how he has greatly influenced my life.  I hope to hear from you soon.

Until then, be blessed my brothers and sisters.