Though I have been a christian for many years, my relationship with God has not always been the best. Having no authority in my early years that you could trust left me even doubtful of God. He knew this and often times, he would choose to conversate about things he knew was wrong with me. The result of those times, was me packing my bags and saying that I was done. I was done so much that I had gotten used to the cycle. In the back of my mind, I was waiting for God to fail me. I didn't stop coming to church, I just stopped responding. I went deadly silent. I prayed for everyone except me. I repented of my sin and I gave that precious tithe. When God got personal, I went to sleep. Those were undoubtedly the worse moments of my life. Yes, the times when I wandered through religion walking the white chalk line, but refusing to kiss his presence. God was relentless. He never stopped trying to reach me. He kept pulling for me. The saints told me that God was through with me. I accepted it because that was what I thought anyway. I was well into my christian years before I really believed he loved me. What drew me back every time, was the life I lived after God. I was a robot just going to make the donuts. I had no purpose. My timing was off. My schedules were off. My life came to a screeching halt, and even as a christian, I contemplated ending it all.
I came back.
Life after You
http://youtu.be/3RsirVKkkcA
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