Personal

Today was one of the hardest messages for me to hear.  My pastor has been preaching an awesome message about seeking the Kingdom and God taking care of your personal business.  It was a hard pill to swallow.  As I said, I was raised as a sacrificial lamb.  You were expected to go broke for ministry and then grin about it.  We were told that you were doing it for the Lord and to keep your hands in your pocket.  This is why I am happy God sends a word to heal you.  You can be believing in a thing for years and it can be absolutely wrong.  We came to church sick and did not stop to go to doctors.  We spent all of money on offerings and had the power shut off.  I watched as my mother made fried chicken, spaghetti and potato salad for the church with great care.  She made it with far more care than I ever saw her give to me and my siblings.  I participated in high school academic bowls for the which my parents never came to a single meet.  My mother did not have a problem going to church.  She had a problem being a part of my everyday life.  Now, in the word, my Pastor is telling me that I should not suffer individually for giving and working in the Kingdom which is a position that the word supports.  How can you lose houses and lands and family members for the sake of Christ and he not make that right.  God is desperately interested in my wellbeing.  Any Sheppard knows that healthy sheep produce the best wool.  Sheep with rabies and foot rot are not productive sheep.  Sheep that are hungry, cold and sick will not produce.  I went to a farm once and I saw a llama mixed in with the sheep because they make very good mothers and they will actually mother the sheep.  What Pastor does not want the sheep in the best condition.  My church founder said it best, when he said, “You have to shear the sheep for the wool, not skin them”.  An institution that is unconcerned about the welfare of its members is a institution that won’t be around long.  If God cared enough to ensure that his will should not grievous then have your cake and eat it too.  Even the apostles who gave their life for the work will receive a throne and eternal life.  That is definitely worth the wait.